Labor Day is a great day to pause and reflect about our work. Why do we work? Is it the money? Is it the joy of using our skills? My guess is that for many, the first response would be "money!"
Over the years, countless songs and movies have reminded us how important money is to us:
"Money is what I want. Your lovin' gives me a thrill but it don't pay the bills. Just give me money."
"Show me the money."
"Money makes the world go around. A mark, a yen, a buck or a pound; that clanking sound makes the world go around."
And so it was for the ages...
Until one day, people noticed that a strange phenomenon had occurred. It was like a lightening bolt out of the sky, striking masses of people and jolting them beyond belief. It left them electrified and stunned. Lives were altered, never to be the same again.
What was this new wave that was changing lives to the point that money was no longer the clinking and clanking that made their worlds go around?
Some called it the emotional paycheck. Others called it mid-life crisis. Still others called it selling out. Some even called it heresy or insanity.
But to those who were struck, it was real and significant. In fact, in recent years there has been such an epidemic of it that I talked to several people who were afflicted. Men and women alike reported similar occurrences. While most were middle to upper income earners, none were rich and most needed an income.
All were willing to change lifestyles to achieve the emotional paycheck.
I asked them, What was it like? What happened?
Well, one day I woke up and thought, "I just can't do this any more."
I used to love my job. It was fun and exciting and rewarding. Then we were bought out. Things changed and corporate didn't care what we thought. We became paper pushers, not creators or contributors.
I was making a lot of money and had great bonuses and stock options. I'd reached the top of the ladder in my field and was in the position I always wanted. Why wasn't I happy? I must be crazy. People would kill for this job and opportunity. But I found myself dreading going to work each day.
I was spending more time at the office than with my kids. My marriage was falling apart. Work was all-consuming. It wasn't worth it.
"So what is the emotional paycheck for you?" I asked.
I can make a difference in peoples' lives. I'm working for a not-for-profit now, where I see the impact of my work.
I started my own business. I may not make as much money as I use to, but I can be part of my kids' lives.
I have a life now. I see my friends and family. I exercise. I have hobbies again.
I have less stress. All the "trappings" of success made life stressful. I had to keep up. I have peace of mind now.
So here's the coaching for the month: As we take a day of rest from work on Labor Day, let us also remember why this holiday was started. According to the Department of Labor, it was started to "recognize the social and economic achievements of American workers. It constitutes a national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity and well-being of our country."
It seems that somehow along the way, many businesses and workers have lost the sense of making a contribution to our country. For many, the focus has become making a contribution to the strength and prosperity of the company first and foremost.
While I am a proponent of strong companies, I wonder how different our lives and communities would be if our focus was on something far greater, such as the well-being of our country. Would we feel the need for an emotional paycheck? Or, do we need an emotional paycheck because we have lost our focus?
What are you doing to balance the scales for your own emotional paycheck? What are you doing to contribute to the strength, prosperity and well-being for our communities and country?
If not you, who? If not now, when?
Marty Stanley is a certified business and life coach. She works with business leaders and their teams to put the structures in place to increase personal, professional and organizational effectiveness and get results. You can reach her at (816) 822-4047 or .
